Tones...vibrations...feelings...it is interesting trying to put language to this. There is, in my experience, a unique feeling that connects with certain places, memories, music. A feeling that I cannot possibly describe in any language, that simply is. I might also call these tones - together they form a sort of resonance that is integral to my perception of myself. Perhaps behind and within all of that there is a tone that is simply mine, simply me. If so, I am not sure I can yet perceive it, identify it, recognize it from within.
"Sometimes naming is a blessing, not a limitation."
I find myself being grateful to my father, who viewed my naming as a project in discerning resonance, who did not feel bound by conventions. His notes of naming possibilities are fun to revisit.
I feel it is also my lesson in this time to learn to discern *yes* and *no* within myself. (https://dendroica.substack.com/p/interlude-on-discernment-and-will) Sometimes my mind will get carried away, creating a "yes" from perceived synchronicity or desire when there is not real alignment. And sometimes my mind will get in the way, adding confusion to a "yes" if it doesn't match my *ideas* of what would be resonant or what I most want. And then sometimes, I feel, there is simply not an answer, not a sense of surrendering or yielding into yes or no. And in these cases, the most clarity I feel within myself is that *there is no right answer*, that I need to exercise my own will, my own spontaneous spark to make a choice, to weave my own tone into the pattern as conscious creator.
In this particular time I find my sense of what is resonant shifting. I am overdue to head south, to a music festival in Ashland I signed up for months ago. And yet I find that I have been opting out of parties and gatherings, nesting in my new home, finding a sort of quiet resonance in long walks and one-on-one visits. I will still be going - it doesn't feel like a "no" per se - but I think I am letting go of a former self that needed to get there on time, keep to a schedule, not miss anything, and simply flowing with the water within me.
Ahh…I love that you are allowing yourself to flow more! I used to be almost always in a kind of tension push/rush to make sure I was “on time”…when I went through my big wake up call/healing crisis, that was one of the first things that had to go…my trying to align with my perception of external “right” or “proper” timing, and began tuning into “there is plenty of time for all I wish to accomplish” type thoughts and most importantly feelings. And I noticed that my weaving in synchrony became even more effortless!! I hope you had a good time at the gathering. I am taking a solo trip to the dry side to photograph a few essences in more of their natural habitat. I’m looking forward to time alone with the wild. I never responded about a potential fall equinox gathering camping. That could really align for me. Curious who else you know who might want to join…Hannah…and?
And about inner yes and no…the reason I cherish kinesiology as a tool is that it completely bypasses the intellectual mind, and is simply an amplification of an inner process that is always occurring when we are awake. I used to be so much more up in my head, trying to figure things out…and while I can still be “up” there, the tendency is to tune into my somatic response, not as an objective marker, but as a present moment indication of whether my focus harmonizes with my deeper self, or not.
Yes, the tones that cannot be easily described but can be felt…the more u pay attention to these, draw them upwards to the surface of my awareness and noticing, the more they expand, and contribute to the overall increase in my sense of resonance. I was thinking of how one might say “well we can resonate with anything” and indeed that is so if we use the word that way, but, when we speak of - say- the resonance a guitar has, with true wood that has come alive through the alignment of its molecules via being played and cared for…this whole body cellular vibration of well-being…that’s the resonance I mean.. and the one I know you refer to as well.
I am not quite sure what it would mean to say I can resonate with anything. For me, resonance is extremely specific, a feeling of internal vibration that - if strong enough - also creates a somatic response that brings tears to my eyes. I can feel resonance with music, with a person, with a synchronous unfolding, although usually it is encapsulated in a short phrase or thought that simply vibrates. Though perhaps that is unique to my experience.
I had a number of those "resonant revelations" at the gathering, largely regarding the way I constrain myself, keep myself small, a certain somatic resistance I still need to work through to opening to outward expression/sharing even as I no longer feel much in the way of self-doubt or self-judgment on a mental level. The gathering also synchronously shared space with the Goddess Temple of Ashland, and I felt a resonance with their work and their people - not too much in the way of rigid beliefs and a commitment to inner work and each finding our own inner truth. And interestingly they are soon opening a new location a few miles from my house.
As for an equinox gathering...
This starts to feel challenging when it comes to deciding on invitations etc. On some level, this also feels like the larger field is orchestrating so perhaps we only need to set an intention and a date and see what arranges. I would certainly invite Hannah. Others on Substack are farther afield, but perhaps some will magically be in Oregon at that time... And then, also, I don't think we are quite as rare in our experience of inner resonance as we sometimes seem to be - we are just the ones with Substacks.
This is a poem. The cadence is like the movement of water to and fro up and down, rolling over smooth pebbles and jagged rocks. Rippling, swishing, flowing.
Tones...vibrations...feelings...it is interesting trying to put language to this. There is, in my experience, a unique feeling that connects with certain places, memories, music. A feeling that I cannot possibly describe in any language, that simply is. I might also call these tones - together they form a sort of resonance that is integral to my perception of myself. Perhaps behind and within all of that there is a tone that is simply mine, simply me. If so, I am not sure I can yet perceive it, identify it, recognize it from within.
"Sometimes naming is a blessing, not a limitation."
I find myself being grateful to my father, who viewed my naming as a project in discerning resonance, who did not feel bound by conventions. His notes of naming possibilities are fun to revisit.
I feel it is also my lesson in this time to learn to discern *yes* and *no* within myself. (https://dendroica.substack.com/p/interlude-on-discernment-and-will) Sometimes my mind will get carried away, creating a "yes" from perceived synchronicity or desire when there is not real alignment. And sometimes my mind will get in the way, adding confusion to a "yes" if it doesn't match my *ideas* of what would be resonant or what I most want. And then sometimes, I feel, there is simply not an answer, not a sense of surrendering or yielding into yes or no. And in these cases, the most clarity I feel within myself is that *there is no right answer*, that I need to exercise my own will, my own spontaneous spark to make a choice, to weave my own tone into the pattern as conscious creator.
In this particular time I find my sense of what is resonant shifting. I am overdue to head south, to a music festival in Ashland I signed up for months ago. And yet I find that I have been opting out of parties and gatherings, nesting in my new home, finding a sort of quiet resonance in long walks and one-on-one visits. I will still be going - it doesn't feel like a "no" per se - but I think I am letting go of a former self that needed to get there on time, keep to a schedule, not miss anything, and simply flowing with the water within me.
Ahh…I love that you are allowing yourself to flow more! I used to be almost always in a kind of tension push/rush to make sure I was “on time”…when I went through my big wake up call/healing crisis, that was one of the first things that had to go…my trying to align with my perception of external “right” or “proper” timing, and began tuning into “there is plenty of time for all I wish to accomplish” type thoughts and most importantly feelings. And I noticed that my weaving in synchrony became even more effortless!! I hope you had a good time at the gathering. I am taking a solo trip to the dry side to photograph a few essences in more of their natural habitat. I’m looking forward to time alone with the wild. I never responded about a potential fall equinox gathering camping. That could really align for me. Curious who else you know who might want to join…Hannah…and?
And about inner yes and no…the reason I cherish kinesiology as a tool is that it completely bypasses the intellectual mind, and is simply an amplification of an inner process that is always occurring when we are awake. I used to be so much more up in my head, trying to figure things out…and while I can still be “up” there, the tendency is to tune into my somatic response, not as an objective marker, but as a present moment indication of whether my focus harmonizes with my deeper self, or not.
Yes, the tones that cannot be easily described but can be felt…the more u pay attention to these, draw them upwards to the surface of my awareness and noticing, the more they expand, and contribute to the overall increase in my sense of resonance. I was thinking of how one might say “well we can resonate with anything” and indeed that is so if we use the word that way, but, when we speak of - say- the resonance a guitar has, with true wood that has come alive through the alignment of its molecules via being played and cared for…this whole body cellular vibration of well-being…that’s the resonance I mean.. and the one I know you refer to as well.
I am not quite sure what it would mean to say I can resonate with anything. For me, resonance is extremely specific, a feeling of internal vibration that - if strong enough - also creates a somatic response that brings tears to my eyes. I can feel resonance with music, with a person, with a synchronous unfolding, although usually it is encapsulated in a short phrase or thought that simply vibrates. Though perhaps that is unique to my experience.
I had a number of those "resonant revelations" at the gathering, largely regarding the way I constrain myself, keep myself small, a certain somatic resistance I still need to work through to opening to outward expression/sharing even as I no longer feel much in the way of self-doubt or self-judgment on a mental level. The gathering also synchronously shared space with the Goddess Temple of Ashland, and I felt a resonance with their work and their people - not too much in the way of rigid beliefs and a commitment to inner work and each finding our own inner truth. And interestingly they are soon opening a new location a few miles from my house.
As for an equinox gathering...
This starts to feel challenging when it comes to deciding on invitations etc. On some level, this also feels like the larger field is orchestrating so perhaps we only need to set an intention and a date and see what arranges. I would certainly invite Hannah. Others on Substack are farther afield, but perhaps some will magically be in Oregon at that time... And then, also, I don't think we are quite as rare in our experience of inner resonance as we sometimes seem to be - we are just the ones with Substacks.
Do you have others in mind?
First I read with my mind...I didn't get it.
Then I took a deep breathe, reading with my soul listening to the movements and yes's inside my body.
My body smiled.
Mmm..Shruthi thank you so much for sharing the depth of your attention here. I feel so much appreciation for how you tuned in.
I like this line especially and a great point: "That the currency of paying attention is limitlessly abundant, re-sourcing the energy of origin now."
Right? I find it to be such a welcome shift in perspective. Very opening, softening in appreciation of this now moment
This is a poem. The cadence is like the movement of water to and fro up and down, rolling over smooth pebbles and jagged rocks. Rippling, swishing, flowing.